COUNSELLING SKILLS

 

COUNSELLING SKILLS

1. Attending behaviours.
2. Building rapport.
3. Close and open-ended questioning.
4.  Active listening.
5. Para phrasing.
6. Summarizing.

  1.Attending

»         Attending refers to the ways in which counsellors can be “with” their clients, both physically and psychologically.

»           Effective attending tells clients that you are with them and that they can share their world with you.

»         Effective attending also puts you in a position to listen carefully to what your clients are saying.

»         The acronym SOLER can be used to help you to show your inner attitudes and values of respect and genuineness towards a client.

»         S: Squarely face your client. Adopt a bodily posture that indicates involvement with your client.

»         O: Open posture. Ask yourself to what degree your posture communicates openness and availability to the client. Crossed legs and crossed arms may be interpreted as diminished involvement with the client or even unavailability or remoteness, while an open posture can be a sign that you are open to the client and to what he or she has to say.

»         L: Lean toward the client (when appropriate) to show your involvement and interest. To lean back from your client may convey the opposite message.

»         E: Eye contact with a client conveys the message that you are interested in what the client has to say.

            R: Try to be relaxed or natural with the client.

»         Don't fidget nervously or engage in distracting facial expressions.

»         The client may begin to wonder what it is in himself   or herself that makes you so nervous!

»         Being relaxed means that you are comfortable with using your body as a vehicle of personal contact and   expression and for putting the client at ease.

»         Effective attending puts counsellors in a position to listen carefully to what their clients are saying or not   saying.

2. BUILDING RAPPORT

»         Rapport forms the basis of meaningful, close and harmonious relationships between people.

»          It’s the sense of connection that you get when you meet someone you like and trust, and whose point of view you understand.

»          It’s the bond that forms when you discover that you share one another’s values and priorities in life.

q  According to researchers Linda Tickle-Degnen and Robert Rosenthal, when you have a rapport with someone, you share:

Ÿ  Mutual attentiveness: You are both focused on, and interested in, what the other person is saying or doing.

Ÿ  Positivity: you are both friendly and happy, and you show care and concern for one another.

Ÿ  Coordination: you feel “in sync” with one another, so that you share a common understanding. Your energy levels, tone and body language are also similar.

   Techniques to Build Rapport

1.Watch the other person’s body language including gesture, posture and expression.

2.Adopt a similar temperament. If the other person is introverted or extroverted, shy or exuberant, you should behave in the same way.

3.Use similar language: If he uses simple, direct words, then you should, too. If he speaks in technical

  language, then match that style. You can also reiterate key or favorite words or phrases.

4.Match the other person’s speech patterns, such as tone, tempo and volume. For instance, if he speaks

     softly and slowly, then lower the volume and tempo of your voice.

3. PROBING OR QUESTIONING

»         Probing involves statements and questions from the counsellor that enable clients to explore more fully any relevant issue of their lives.

»          Probes can take the form of statements, questions, requests, single word or phrases and non-verbal prompts.

Probes or questions serve the following purposes:

Ÿ  to encourage non-assertive or reluctant clients to tell their stories.

Ÿ  to help clients to remain focused on relevant and important issues.

Ÿ  to help clients to identify experiences, behaviours and feelings that give a fuller picture to their story, in other words, to fill in missing pieces of the picture.

Ÿ  to help clients to move forward in the helping process to help clients understand themselves and their problem situations more fully.

4. Listening

q  Listening refers to the ability of counsellors to capture and understand the messages clients communicate as they tell their stories, whether those messages are transmitted verbally or nonverbally.

Active listening involves the following four skills:

»         The counsellor has to listen to the mix of experiences, behaviour and feelings the client uses to describe his or her problem situation.

»         Also “hear” what the client is not saying.

»         Listening to and interpreting the client's nonverbal messages. Counsellors should learn how to listen to and read nonverbal messages such as bodily behaviour (posture, body movement and gestures), facial expressions (smiles, frowns, raised eyebrows, twisted lips), voice? Related behaviour (tone, pitch, voice level, intensity, inflection, spacing of words, emphases, pauses, silences) etc.

5.PARAPHRASING

»         When you paraphrase, you use your own words to express something that was written or said by another person.

»          Putting it into your own words can clarify the message, make it more relevant to your audience or give it greater impact.

»         Paraphrased material should keep its original meaning and (approximate) length, but you an use it to pick out a single point from a longer discussion.

 

Paraphrasing in Counselling skills:

»             Paraphrasing occurs when the counselor states what the client has just said, using fewer words but without changing the meaning of what the client said. 

»         when utilizing this skill, you attempt to feed back the essence of what the person has just said.

How to improve paraphrasing skills?

The following techniques should be used to improve paraphrasing skills:

1.Read your text/paragraph and ensure that you understand it.

2.Write down your ideas without looking at the original.

3.Use synonyms or change the word order of your sentence.

4.Compare with the original to see whether you are conveying the same meaning.

6. Summarizing

»         It is sometimes useful for the counsellor to summarize what was said in a session so as to provide a focus to what was previously discussed, and so as to challenge the client to move forward.

»          Summaries are particularly helpful under the following circumstances:

»          At the beginning of a new session. A summary of this point can give direction to clients who do not know   where to start; it can prevent clients from merely repeating what they have already said, and it can   pressure a client to move forwards.

»         When a session seems to be going nowhere. In such circumstances, a summary may help to focus the client.